FEAR FACTOR
Hello, and welcome to Tabby's Nocturnal Nights. My name is Brenda. Today I want to talk about edits, or rather why I'm finding it so hard to finish the edits in the last five chapters of my MS.
I'm a funny person, I actually like editing and revising my WIP. I love seeing the improvements, seeing my characters turn into three dimensional people, filling crazy plot holes, smoothing out the flow, cutting words, etc, etc. But that love has changed to dread. I'm down to the last five chapters and I'm doing nothing but procrastinating.
Why am I doggin it? I should be thrilled, happy I'm almost done. Elated to move onto querying agents, chugging forward on this crazy journey . . . but I'm not. Instead of happiness, I feel fear. Whenever I say to myself, “sit down and get going on edits,” I quickly find something else to do.
Grrr, this is getting most annoying. I'll open up the chap I'm working on, get 15mins into revisions, and then need to stop. My brain keeps throwing up blocks right, left and, center.
I decided to take a couple days off—let my brain relax. I had hoped when I got back to work things would run smooth. Wrong. Same damn thing kept happening, road blocks at every turn. Plus, I was stuck aboard the procrastination train and couldn't seem to find a station to disembark.
Okay, now I'm officially pissed. What the hell is going on? What . . . is . . . the . . .problem??
Then suddenly—LOL, I know writers hate suddenly, but really, in this instance it was sudden—the answer came to me. My inner self was purposely blocking my path, wanting me to drag my feet so I wouldn't finish my MS. I was sabotaging MYSELF!!!!!
Why you ask? Because once I have my novel as polished as I can get it, then I will have to move onto the next stage: writing a winning query, a one, three, and five page synopsis, create my own web-site, produce a book trailer, and the list goes on and on and on . . .
Crap, with a capitol C. The truth was staring me in the face. I was scared. I'm afraid to start what I call the business end of writing. I know, I know, I should have my query, synopsis, one line pitch, web-site, etc, etc done before my manuscript is finished, but I told myself I wanted my MS polished to a high gloss shine then I could concentrate fully on the business end. Now that I'm getting close I'm starting to freeze up.
Another reason for my fear is I'm not ready to be done with my characters. I love them. I've spent two and a half years with them.
The worst part is I've grown comfortable in my character's world, and it's getting close to setting them aside to venture out into the world where I have no clue what to expect.
Funny, now that I know what is bothering me, I feel better. The fear and uncertainty are still very much there, but knowing is half the battle. Right?
Anyway, that is a peek into my crazy brain. Do any of you have similar fears and worries? I would love to hear from you.
Okay, I would like to conduct a little poll, strictly just for fun and curiosity. The two hot guys feature dthis week are two of my absolute favs from the show Supernatural. My question is, who do you think is sexier, Jensen Ackles as Dean, or Jared Padalecki as Sam?
Tabitha, if you're reading this, I have another suggestion for the weekly hotty. His name is Misha Collins. He plays the hot and sexy Angel, Castiel on Supernatural.
3 comments:
You got it girl I will have him posted on Monday. I also understand the feeling of lose when you finish a MS. You get so involved and attached to your characters then it is just over. You have to send the story out into the world and hope they receive as much love from readers as they did from you. Its a lot like your kids you can only raise them to a certain point and then they have to go out into the world on their own. I have read your book and believe me they are going to be loved. For one your men are sexy as hell and the story is amazing. So set your fears aside and have some confidence in yourself. I believe in you believe in yourself.
Let's just say my final edit has been looking at me all week. No gusto or energy to start and finish. It happens. BTW, JENSEN IS MINE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
CMAC
CMAC, you sound like you are right where I am. Yep, I have no gusto or energy to finish. My head wants me to it's my heart that is holding me back. LOL, well my heart better just shut it and let me finish!
So, you're a Jensen woman. I am too. Though Jared--Sam--is pretty smoking. He sure buffed himself up. When he takes off his shirt...wow! But I think what I love about Jensen--Dean--is his attitude. He's a total tough guy. LOL, he comes up with the best one-liners.
Post a Comment